Enduring a Slow Dwindle and a Gradual Decline

My brother Roark sent this email a few weeks ago, we have all been worrying and wondering about dad's dementia and melanoma. Unfortunately it looks like there is no easy diagnosis. In a way I think we were all hoping that the melanoma would hasten his death because of the stress on mom and Dad's quality of life. So we are all enduring to the end with him. Luckily I have many good memories that I can look back on when the sadness almost overwhelms me.

Dad rowing on the Snake River below Jackson Hole, WY, Labor Day weekend 2007, before his dementia got too bad.

Dear Loved Ones,
Just a quick update on what's going on with Dad. At the beginning of February, we did a CT of his chest and abdomen to follow up on the one three months before. There were no significant changes. The nodules on the lining of his lung had not changed. Tuesday, he had an MRI of his head, which showed brain atrophy, but no evidence of metastatic disease. The good news is there is no evidence that his melanoma has spread. The bad news is that means a more likely course is a slow dwindle. Melanoma is notorious for developing metastases out of the blue, and with no warning. Dad's main symptoms of dementia, swelling in his hands, red scaly skin, and poor balance I can't explain for sure, but suspect they are part of this gradual decline. I've considered using diuretics to help with the swelling, but worry he'll have a hard time making it to the bathroom in time.

My dad continues to be pleasant and tractable and is always in my heart and in my prayers.

Love, Roark (and Melanie)

I love this picture of dad with the grandkids on the same trip.