The Lord Doesn't Care What You Wear

There are a group of women who are wearing pants to sacrament meeting this Sunday as sort of a "civil obedience" form of protest that they want to be treated the same as men and given equal opportunities to serve in in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latterday Saints. I was asked how I felt about this. These are strictly my opinions and I will not be pulling in any quotes from others to support my opinions.

First off let me say that I think we are talking about two completely different issues here. What anyone wears to church is completely different from everyone holding the priesthood, male or female.

What we wear is to church is a cultural manner. By dressing up we are showing our Heavenly Father respect and adoration. Just as we wear our best to a job interview, fancy party, or to impress someone, we do the same for the Lord. But the definition of "our best" has changed over the years, Many churches no longer require best dress to worship in their churches. It is come as you are.

The LDS church has encouraged its members to dress to show their respect to the Lord. However we are becoming a world wide church and it seems to me that members across the world dress in their cultural best when they go to church so we can't say that dresses and suits are always the norm.

However, many new converts and members without sufficient means to buy dress clothes cannot always wear "Sunday best" to church. Does the Lord (or should we) think differently about these brothers and sisters? Absolutely not.

A few years ago I was in Saint George, Utah after the marathon there. John had had a serious heart attack at the end of the race and was in intensive care at the local hospital. I was staying with my sweet niece Dianna in her collage apartment because she didn't want me to be alone after everyone left when we knew John was going to make it. I woke early Monday morning, but couldn't get in to see John until 10:00 am. I didn't want to sit around with a bunch of collage girls, no matter how good their intentions were, so I left their apartment and started driving around St George. They lived just a few blocks away from the temple, so I pulled over and started walking around and having my own little pity party. I noticed people entering the temple with their little suitcases like they were going to do a session, but it was Monday and I didn't think the temple was open on Mondays. I followed thinking if I could do a session it might help my wounded heart. As I walked up the steps and realized I had jeans on I and almost turned around. But I girded my proverbial loins (jeans) and entered. As always there were cute senior couples working the front desk,  I walked up to the desk feeling very conspicuous in my jeans, told my story and asked if I could enter the temple even though I wasn't dressed appropriately. The elderly brother looked me in the eye, put his hand on mine and said some people might mind but the Lord doesn't care what you wear, please enter and find peace. I started to cry, and felt wrapped in the comforting arms of my Savior.

I tell this story because although I know He will love me no matter what I wear, I always want to show my love and honor to Him through what I wear when I am in His house. So when I go to church to partake of His holy sacrament and ordinances, I will wear the best I can: be it jeans or Sunday best.

Seventy Times Seven

This past week I had an experience with forgiveness that I also hope will always stay with me.

In the past I have usually associated forgiveness with wrongs done to me. I need to to forgive when some one hurts me, or those I love. To be honest, I have lived such a blessed life that all the hurts done to me have been very minor and easy to forgive and forget.

My mother (she just told me it was my dad's concept, but she was the one that taught us) always taught us that most things that are said or done to hurt us are not done intentionally or maliciously. They maybe be said unthinkingly or because someone has had a bad day, (or is an idiot) but are rarely said to actually hurt or be mean. She told us if we considered the source we wouldn't be hurt. I have tried to live my life giving people the benefit of the doubt and thus don't get my feelings hurt very easily.

However when it comes down to me that needed to be forgiven I don't think I have always been so honest with myself. Our family has been blessed (or cursed) with a good self confidence. We were taught to always know the reason why we acted the way we did, "I don't know" was never a good answer when accounting for our actions. We have accused Thomas with being "blissfully overconfident" because he always thinks he is right, usually is and life hasn't had time to give him a few knocks. My brother Roark is famous for the non apology apology, ie: "I am sorry you don't think I am right, but I still am." So admitting we are wrong and asking for forgiveness does not come naturally

Anyway this past week I said something about someone I shouldn't have; I didn't have all the information to say what I said and made some assumptions that just were not true. I was over heard and my comments spread and got back to the offended party and that person was very hurt to the point of not wanting anything to do with us for a while.

After analyzing what happened I realized it was my comment that started the whole chain of events that ended up in such hurt feelings. I was heart sick, truly overcome with remorse.

We just had had a lesson in Relief Society lesson last Sunday from the Teachings of President George Albert Smith on forgiveness. The the sister taught it from the point of view that if we have unity and charity in our hearts forgiving and asking for forgiveness could come easier for us. As I thought back on that lesson I realized that I wanted the unity and love back we had always felt and I would do anything to make it right.

So I called and begged for forgiveness and hopefully was forgiven. And I realized that asking for forgiveness is just as important as forgiving someone. That the seventy times seven commandment to forgive also applies to asking for forgiveness, no matter what. I did not mean to hurt anyone with a thoughtless comment, but I did and I had to ask for forgiveness to start the healing process.

What Do You Call A Flower That Grows Where You Don't Want It?

This year's garden actually started with the big
windstorm we had last December. We lost two spruces that were getting large enough give us some serious shade in our yard. All of a sudden I had two new sunny spots, that while technically were in my flower beds I used for zucchini, watermelon and peppers. After years of trying, I finally joined the ranks of gardeners everywhere who were trying to figure out what to do with all their excess squash.

But the biggest surprise of the summer was the delicious watermelons we were able to grow. John has always wanted to grow watermelons, but we just didn't have a long enough growing season in the hollow. A customer, who is a master gardener, recommended a variety called Sugar Baby, it is smaller and more suited to the northern Utah climate. He suggested we start the seeds in the green house in May to lengthen the growing season. The flavor and texture were like the old fashioned watermelon we used to eat, seeds and all. Funny story: I gave Ezra and Travis a slice to eat outside and they didn't know what to do with the seeds. I guess seeded watermelon are becoming a thing of the past.

I ordered some mini stripped pumpkin seeds from Park's Seed called Lil Pumpkemon and they grew like crazy. I probably harvested 100 or so, and gave most of them away. I loved being able to share with anyone who came over, and I even left a few on neighbors door steps. Though next year people want plants in the spring so they can grow their own. I might have to order 2 packages.

Aren't they cute?

And of course the flower garden was fabulous as always. Best new plant: Black Eyed Susan Vines that I planted in the pots on the side porch and the patio and they took over any support they were close to with just a little coaxing. I was afraid they were going to take over the world, or attack people as they came in the side door!  This is just one plant.












     It seemed like every time I turned around I found
new volunteer flowers growing willy nilly where ever they pleased. Petunias, Alyssum, Marigolds, 4 O'clocks, Portulaca, and Pansies grew with wild abandon. I finally understood the saying: "What do you call a flower that grows where you don't want it? A weed." But most I welcomed with open arms.

Fall Travels

Fall has been a busy time here on Hods Hollow.  I have been harvesting and putting the garden to bed for the winter. It was a good year for mini stripped pumpkins, tomatoes, peppers, and zucchini and of course flowers. I cut the last of the roses before our first frost, not wanting to totally let go of summer. Fall roses are bigger, softer, and just a little bit faded when compared to their summer time glory. Kind of like me in middle age.

I have been spending quite a bit of time with both sets of parents, but especially John's mother. She had cellulitis and then a heart attack this fall and has been in and out of the hospital twice along with several weeks of 24/7 home care by her family. It has been hard to watch our parents age and makes me wonder what kind of an old lady I will be. Hopefully just a little more faded. . . and maybe softer.



I borrowed these pictures from Leslie's blog, they really capture the joy of the river.



Joey is still the best dog in the world! Just ask Owen.

In between the business of the fall season John and I have managed to get a few trips in, although not always together. We went on our annual Labor Day trip to raft the Snake River below Jackson. Clay, Leslie and Owen (who called me Grandma) came up from Moab and Stacey and Steve came all the way from Delaware along with Haley and Erin and her two boys. Also our friends, Mike and Jennifer Webb and their twins, Greta and Matthew. We also had three dogs, two puppies and Joey. She tried to keep up with the puppies and was so sore the next day she could hardly move. Alas, she is also getting old.

Again pictures from Leslie: we have a great family!

John went on a river trip on the Middle Fork of the Salmon without me. I stayed home and watched the office so he could go. It was a raft, cast and blast trip, thought John was perfectly happy just rafting.

Does this look like a happy rafter?

A week after John got home Annie and I went to Rocky Point with Jayne, Dave, my sister Ann and Alison, Brandon and their cute son Russell. Colby and Jane Anne came down from Phoenix for conference weekend. You know what they say about a day at the beach. . . .



Sisters on the beach, what fun.



Cousins! Annie, Colby, Jane Anne, Alison, Russell and Brandon

And finally we just got back from our last river trip of the season: the Westwater Canyon of the Colorado. Clay wanted to celebrate his 30th birthday on Westwater and since Leslie was too pregnant to go he invited us!

Tice (home from his mission only 8 days), Melanie, me, John (doesn't he look handsome with a beard?) Thomas and birthday boy Clay



Thomas in his Kayak with our raft behind going through Skull rapid.

You have to look really hard to see Thomas' helmet, the waves were over his head!

It was a wonderful, beautiful, fabulous time. For some reason I was fine with the river even though I had never been on it and there were supposed to be some scary rapids, I felt no stress or fear. even when Thomas "went swimming" as he calls tipping over and falling out of his kayak three times in pretty big rapids. As long as I could see his helmet I was OK. Who wouldn't be with a view like this to calm her soul.

 



Living the Life

It has been over a month since I last wrote, life has been busy with trips, kayaking, cancer scares and aging parents.

The end of July Meg, Ezra, Travis, Maggie and I drove to Kansas City to visit her brother and then on to Saint Louis to visit Matt, Erin, Ian, Lily and Molly.

 

I made cowboy vests before I left for all six grandkids. They looked so cute in them, but I think Ezra was a little under whelmed. It was so much fun to have all the cousins together for four days. Six kids 7 and under made for some crazy but happy times (Mom had 7 kids in 7 years, it still amazes me.)

Erin, Meg and I took all the kids to the Saint Louis Zoo.  

   

At times I couldn't tell who were the wild animals. . . and who were just monkeys!



Are we having fun yet?



 





The St Louis Botanical Gardens has a fabulous children's garden with a splash pad and tree house and play area and were also having a Chinese Lantern Festival so we made an afternoon and evening of it.

 







The lantern festival was beautiful, the kids were great, though at times it was like herding sheep












Meg went back to Kansas City to spend some time with her brother and his family and I got to play longer with Matt and Erin and family.  We went to the swimming pool. . .

. . .and a butterfly and insect garden



Yes those are roaches, Molly was fascinated!

  I got home and helped put on a RS summer party,  my sister Ann was receiving her radiation treatment for breast cancer, Shelley was getting a breast biopsy for cancer, (it was negative, thank heavens) getting my mammogram, (normal,) Brett had a colonoscopy that found polyps that were months away from cancer and my mother-in-law fell and we had to meet her at the ER for a goose egg on the back of her head and a small cut that  wouldn't stop bleeding.

John and I also celebrated our 35th wedding anniversary last Sunday while Chris and Meg were here to work on the kayak that John is helping them build

And on Thursday I am getting a colonoscopy. Yes I am "living the life."

Why Do I Keep Doing This?

John has been planning a 3 day two night river trip on the Colorado with Chris and Meg and their kiddos for months. We would start at the bridge in Moab and finish 20 miles down river at Potash. The river is smooth and wide and a perfect place to bring small children, our red raft and a newly finished kayak.

The weather had been hot and sunny for weeks and we were looking forward to getting on the river. Friday was the perfect lazy river day. Ezra was in the water more often than not. A lot of the time the river was shallow enough to walk down and we were all in the water at one time or another.  I even talked Travis into getting into the water with grandma.

We set up camp across the river from one of Chris and Meg's favorite climbing spots in the Moab area. It looked like some thunderstorms were rolling in, but nothing serious. John had offered to let Ezra, Maggie and Travis sleep in our Kirkham's tent/screen shelter with us and they were pretty excited. Just as we all were settling down to the pitter patter of intermittent rain and a flapping tent, a sudden micro burst  blew our tent down! Maggie was screaming, Ezra was trying to be brave and Travis went back to sleep while John and Chris were running around like crazy in various states of undress trying to get it back up and anchored. (It was actually pretty funny, looking back on it.)

The kayak was by the paddles before the storm

 

The next morning was beautiful, the calm river reflecting the red cliffs. John went to check things out and the kayak wasn't where we had left it. The wind had rolled it 2 or 3 times like a tumble weed!  But not harm done and  we were soon on the river hoping to get some miles in before another lazy afternoon.

The river was full of sand bars and we actually had to get out and push the raft and kayak a couple of times. At one point a tourist power boat came up behind us and went roaring down the deeper left channel of a island/sandbar while we were already committed to the right where we thought was Gold Bar, a boat ramp and recreation area. We were wishing we could had followed the power boat when we got stuck again.

As we got out to push and pull we looked up river to check on Chris and Meg in the kayak and saw a huge red dust cloud with black clouds behind it rushing towards us kicking up spray as it came. We knew the microburst was going to hit us, so I had Maggie, Travis and Ezra get down in the bottom of the raft with me while John was trying to keep the raft straight and rowed for the boat ramp and safety. I watched the cloud envelope Chris and Meg in the kayak and then it hit us. Strangely, I never felt afraid, I had been in winds like this before and knew we could handle them. I was more worried about the children. Of course Maggie was afraid and started crying, but Ezra and Travis were so brave, even though they were scared. Within minutes we were at the boat ramp and Meg hustled the kids into a vault toilet (it was very clean and had no smell,) because it was the only place that was protect from the wind and rain.

 

We ended up getting off the river at Gold Bar, we were told we still had 11 miles to go to Potash, when it  was really 6. But we were all okay with it. We went to Cortez, made our dutch oven lasagna in the oven, and had a good night's sleep. As we were talking about our favorite things on the river with Ezra and Travis we told them how much we had been blessed. That our prayers for safety had been answered. Had we gone left at the sand bar we would not have been able to get to the boat ramp and would have had to face the microburst on the river.

I would not have missed this trip for the world, mircrobursts and all. I got to spend time with John, Chris and Megan and Ezra, Travis and Maggie. And witness an answer to prayer.

Full Circle

I finished a quilt last month, a quilt I started three years ago for the Young Women's program in our ward. I was asked to help the girls with a stake sponsored quilting project where the girls would make a quilt using one of the value colors and then give it away as a service project. Someone in the stake thought it would be a great idea . . . So we started a friendship quilt and I had all the girls make a quilt block, sign it and I would just have to get the blocks sewn together and quilted. That was the idea, anyway. We got all the signatures and half the blocks pieced then our stake and ward YW presidencies were changed and everything got put into my unfinished projects pile when the program went a different direction with the new leadership.

Fast forward to last May. My sewing room was a disaster area--fabric, notions and projects everywhere. I am a "walk into a room and set things down" kind of person. I want to be a "walk into a room and put things away" kind of person but I either get lazy or distracted or don't know where to put something and just plop it down and walk away and then clean and sort everything every couple of months. I can usually find things, but occasionally I forget about something at the bottom of a pile. Plus I had boxes and boxes of mom's fabric waiting for me to go through.

YW Friendship quilt blocks, our value color was green





So for mother's day and my birthday this year John made me shelves that spanned an entire wall of my sewing room. And I cleaned and sorted and put fabric, notions and projects away on my new shelves. It's a miracle! I am now a "walk into a room and put things away" person.  It has been a month and things are still put away. John said he envisioned a space that looked like an old fashioned mercantile. Since a lot of the fabric is my moms, any siblings and nieces or nephews are welcome to come and "shop". 

But while cleaning and sorting I found the unfinished YW friendship blocks with all those signatures and thought I really should finish this quilt before the girls are all grown and gone and give it to the YW president.  I know most of the girls, but I thought the quilt would mean more to the YW president, who has worked with the girls than to me. So I finished it, including all the value colors, and got more signatures of girls new to Young Women's since we started the quilt and all the leaders who had worked in the program with the past three years.  I stitched around the names of the young women and women who "stand as a witness of God" and was humbled to include my name with theirs on the quilt. What started as a forgotten assignment from the stake become my personal service project.

I titled the quilt "We Will Stand as a Witness of God"

We gave the quilt to Donna Egan, the YW president, at girls camp last week. Interestingly enough, it was the same camp that I went to with Annie as a new Beehive three weeks after we moved into our ward. (The first of 10 girls camp I went to in our ward.) The girls that were at the camp this year weren't even a twinkle in their parent's eyes 18 years ago. My circle of sisterhood has truly grown.