Which One is Dad?

Jayne called and said that Caitlin wanted a picture of dad when he was in the military. She wanted pictures of both of Chase's grandparents when they were in the Airforce. Mom had these pictures of dad and Uncle Bob when they were flight engineers for the B-36. 

So, which picture is dad and which one is Uncle Bob. 

Both are dad. According to mom, uncle Bob was on a flight on the day the pictures were taken. After they took dad's picture, they took another one of him and put Uncle Bob's name on the second one.

She also had this picture of the twins that was taken for a newspaper article. They were the only identical twins in the SAC.

And this picture of dad when he was in the Air Cadets. I see a resemblance to some of the grandsons. Does anyone else?

Christmas at a Glance

A brief synopsis of Christmas.

Santa John's workshop: Chest of drawers for Matt and Erin, hutch for Annie , not pictured, hutch for Thomas and Monica, mini stools for Ian, Lily and Molly, and table or Chris and Meg.

Mrs Santa's workshop: 7 rice neck warmer bags that I called Grandma Hugs for the grandkids and Monica, wall quilt for Matt and Erin's family, Christmas tree skirt for me, and 9 felted wool ornaments. 

Traveling to the Midwest after Christmas: going over I-70 through Colorado the day after Christmas because I-80 was closed, going home through Wyoming on I-80 during a ground blizzard between Cheyenne and Rawlins and trying to find a place to eat after said ground blizzard in Rawlins. No fast food just a place called Buck's Watering Hole. The deer rear end was the first thing we saw when we entered the bar and grill. It actually wasn't bad, but I was worried.

Time spent with Grandkids: we stopped in Kansas City for two days with Chris and Meg, then drove to St. Louis for 3 days with Matt and Erin, then everyone went to Chris and Meg's for a family New Year's Eve. It was so great. 

I learned three things on this trip. First, I let Erin and Meg work out our scheduling issues with timing, sickness and activities. Once I let go of thinking like a mom and became the grandma who was just happy to be there, it was really nice not to have to worry about things. And, they did a great job. Second, we talked to Matt and Erin about their issues with the church, agreed to disagree and it was better to have it out in the open. Third, while I enjoy grand babies, I really love having older grand children. They were so cute and responsive with us. When I gave them the Grandma Hugs neck warmers, they were so thrilled. Ezra put his around his neck and gave me an unprompted hug and said "look, I'm between two grandma hugs." I taught Lily a little embroidery and needlepoint and every time I sat down she said "grandma, can you help me stitch now?"  They all got Kindles for Christmas and instead of being off in their own little electronic world they would go snuggle with John while he was reading his Kindle. I love this picture, it says it all.

Joey, the Wonderdog

I did some deep cleaning this week to get ready for mom's and my quilt goup and vacuumed up some of the last dust bunnies comprised of Joey's fur. It was kind of sad.

We had to euthanize Joey our Austrialian shepherd on Christmas Eve. She had been failing for a year due to old age and we knew this was coming. In fact we would assess her condition every time we bought a new bag of dog food. It was such a hard decision to make and we, especially me kept putting it off. She seemed pretty happy, even though she couldn't see or hear much anymore, got very antsy and would pace round and round the house and kept falling down. It seemed like her legs just couldn't hold her up anymore.

The day before Christmas Eve Annie and I were making peanut and pecan brittles and Joey was right there hoping to catch a morsel or two when all of a sudden all four of her legs gave out and she did a hard belly flop onto the wood floors with all four legs splayed out. The look on her face was heartbreaking as she struggled to get up and I knew it was time. Brett had told us that it was better to let her go before she got so bad that she was incontinent, couldn't walk and was suffering. He said a well loved dog will always act happy to see you, no matter how bad she gets, but we would know when it was time. 

John and I both cried Christmas Eve morning as we said good bye. We had to take her to the pound because it is hard for Brett to get the drugs and dispose of the body with new federal regulations. I was worried they would judge us or that they wouldn't understand why we were doing this. In fact I couldn't bring myself to go. John took her. He said the pound was great, very caring and understanding as he cried when he took off her collar and leash. 

This is the last picture we took of Joey the week before Christmas. She tried to play with Kili, 

Thomas and Monica's German shepherd, her BFF and it wore her out. No matter how tired and sore she got she loved to have people over and would wag her butt and dance around so they would pay attention to her. 

Joey was the best dog ever. When we got her she was a fluffy little fur ball and we named her after an Australian baby kangaroo. She had such thick fur. When we gave her her summer shave she always looked ten pounds thinner and like a puppy again. She even acted younger. She was so patient and loyal. Children loved her soft fur and protective instincts. She was well known in the ward as we had several families watch her when went on trips and they would always ask if we minded if she stayed at their house so the kids could play with her and love her. It was a no brainer, stay with a family that had 5 kids to play with or stay alone at home. It was great because Joey always got a vacation when we did. 

Her herding instincts were strong and no matter where we were or who we were with everyone was adopted into the herd. When we took her on the river it drove her crazy to have the boats separated by water. If we were the lead boat she was ok, but if she saw the other boats she wanted them close. When the grandkids stayed with us she would do her rounds several times a night to make sure everyone was ok and slept at the top of the stairs so she knew where everyone was. She would have loved to sleep in the kids rooms but they didn't like her bad doggie breath and alertness keeping them awake. 

I still look for her whenever I come into the house from the garage or on the back patio, patiently waiting to be let in. She is missed.

Last Paddle of the Season

Jayne was in town last weekend awaiting the birth of Leslie's new baby, Leslie seems to take 41 weeks to make a baby so Jayne came up here from Moab for the weekend to spend tome with mom. I managed to talk her into going paddling with us and Thomas and Monica on the Great Salt Lake on what looked to be the last warm weekend of the season. 

According to my sister Ann, the lake is at its lowest point in 50 years. The marina is on exposed concrete and Egg Island is no longer an island. But it was beautiful and great to get out. 

Kili the dog does really well on Thomas and Monica's red canoe, but she was a little betrayed when the water was so salty.

John gallantly offered to let Jayne paddle our tandem kayak and he borrowed one of Annie's. It was one of the few times I have been in the back and realized that keeping us straight is harder than it looks. 

The calm before the holiday storm. 

Dad and the Air Force

Last summer we, my siblings and I, helped mom apply for VA benefits for dad to help pay for the memory unit at the Legacy Center in Bountiful. After months of bureaucracy that assured every "t" was crossed and "i" was dotted he was at last approved for $2000 dollars a month. It was a huge relief for mom as she watched her savings decline by $4700 a month.

I asked mom exactly what dad did in the Air Force. I knew he flew in some kind of bomber and they lived in Rapid City, North Dakota when Roark, Jayne and I were born, but not many of the details. It's one of those times I wished I had asked more questions years ago.

Mom told me that Grandpa Neville said there was a draft notice waiting for dad and Uncle Bob when they came home from their German LDS mission, so they joined the Air Force instead of being drafted.  Mom and dad were married May 14, 1954 after dad got his commission in the Air force as a second lieutenant.  They were stationed at Ellsworth AFB, Rapid City, South Dakota assigned to the B 28 Bombing Wing, from 1955-1957. Dad was a performance flight  engineer for the B-36 Peacemaker. It was a huge bomber designed to fly high,long distances and was equipped to carry nuclear warheads during the Cold War. The B-36 was never deployed for active service but flew reconnaissance missions, practice exercises and competitions. Apparently, the mere threat of the B-36 was enough to make calmer heads prevail in tense Cold War situations. 

Personal and equipment required to keep a B-36 flying.

Dad would go on 24 hour flights over the North Pole into Russia to selected sites where they were prepared to drop their bombs in case of a a nuclear strike. They actually carried unarmed nuclear bombs. He did wilderness survival training in the Sierras where they had to survive for 19 days with only basic supplies like pemmican in case case they were shot down over Siberia. Each flight carried cold weather survival gear for the crew.

Dad in his survival gear with wolverine hoodie.

Mom said he went on these 24 hours flight with an hour pre and post flight checks so he would be gone at least 26 hours per flight. He was in Guam for a 3 1/2  month TDY,

Dad in Guam

was on active alert during the Suez Canal Crisis, meaning he could never be further than 15 minutes away from the line, and went on several flights to Alaska. Mom figured he was gone at least half of the time they lived in Rapid City. Meanwhile she was home alone, with no family, taking care of preemie twins and a one year old. Dad went to Guam right after they brought Jayne and me home from our one month stay in the hospital. She told me "It never occurred to me to ask anyone for help, everyone else was in the same boat I was." 

That's an armful of babies

Dad had opportunities to study meteorology and space medicine as an astronaut , but the commander of the bombing wing would never release him from the award winning bombing crew. Mom said dad didn't want to be a navigator for the B-52, the bomber that phased out the B-36 so he got out of  the service to finish college and start medical school.

I have no idea what my father and father-in-law thought about their service in the United States Armed Forces. Neither one wrote or even talked much about that time of their lives. But I do know that it helped shape them into the fine husbands and fathers they were. There is no other word but sacrifice to describe what they gave for our country. I honor love and respect them and my mother for giving a large part of their young adulthood for the freedoms we now have.

As I honor the family members now serving: Seth and Amanda,  Colby and Jane Anne, Cade and Tailer,  Chase and Caitlin, Alex and Adrianne,  Ben and Ruth and Phil and Kristina.

Thank you. 

Kamikazed!

A few years ago our High Priest's quorum had an activity where the World War II veterans told war stories. It was a fascinating evening listening to these old, ordinary, everyday men tell their tales of war, espionage and heroism.  I am glad they did it when they did because many of these vets have since passed away. Dad Lingard's experience during World War II  is just as amazing and I want our children and grandchildren to have access to his story and pictures before it is forgotten.

David is on the right.

David Dunford Lingard was a radio man in the navy and ironically was  seasick the entire time he was at sea. He was was stationed aboard the destroyer minelayer, USS Lindsey.The end of March 1945 they provided gunfire in support of the Iwo Jima invasion and then went to join the Okinawa campaign. 

"On April 12, 1945, while operating off Okinawa in position  USS Lindsey was struck by two Japanese Kamikaze aircraft, hitting 30 seconds of each other. The second one struck the portside bow, near the number 1 5" turret. The resulting explosion of her powder magazine blew off 60 foot of her bow. The attacks killed 57 and wounded another 57 of her officers and crew. USS Lindsey was towed to Kerama Retto for temporary repairs. The  Lindsey remained in the lagoon for 2 weeks repairing battle damage. On 28 April she departed under tow for Guam, where, after arrival 6 May, she received a temporary bow. She sailed under her own power 8 July for the east coast via Pearl Harbor and the Panama Canal, arriving Norfolk, Virginia 19 August 1945."

The part of the ship where dad's quarters were was demolished during the attack, luckily he was either on duty or rushing to "battle stations" when the kamikaze planes hit the ship.The only thing I ever heard him say about that time was that pulling the body parts of his fellow shipmates out of the ocean was more than any 19 year should have to do.

It was while he was in Norfolk, Virginia for repairs that he met Martha Mary Luton, his future bride, but that is a story for another time.

Cousins

 Last month my cousin Julie and I planned an 80th birthday party for her mother, my Aunt Maxine.  Julie and her brothers and sister were flying Uncle Bob and Aunt Max up to Utah from Arizona as a birthday surprise. Julie just got home from a mission and wanted to invite all the cousins in the area so we could have a cousins reunion as well.

Cousins are family members who while not as important as siblings have a special place in my heart. At this time in our lives we see each other mainly for the funerals of our aunts and uncles and each time I visit with them I wonder why I don't see them more often because I still really enjoy them.

Dad had four siblings, his twin brother, Uncle Bob and Aunt Maxine, older brother Uncle Joe and Aunt Evelyn, and sisters Aunt Anne and Uncle Bob and Aunt Nancy and Uncle Drew. Naturally our family was closest to Uncle Bob and Aunt Maxine's children, Scott, Julie, Chris, Suzanne and Kent who we grouped together and called "Scott and Julie". At least Roark, Jayne, and I did, I am not sure what the rest of the family called them.

The first vacation I remember is a trip we took after dad graduated from medical school and Uncle Bob graduated from law school was a trip to Arizona to see our cousins. We lived close together in Stadium Village, the student housing for the University of Utah but after they graduated I imagine we didn't see much of each other for a couple of years. After that trip, the road between Arizona and Utah was well traveled by the Neville cousins. Mom always bought us new clothes to travel in so we would look nice when we stopped  because she didn't want people to look at the family with all those kids and think she couldn't take care of us.

One of our first trips in our 60s finery Left to right: Shelley, Stacey, Jayne, Annie. Jeanne, Brett, Roark and Mom. This was the first time we ever stayed in a motel.

We would alternate Thanksgivings in Utah and Arizona. It was such a treat to miss school and drive to Arizona on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving. I remember driving past schools in Panguitch and Kanab  gloating to myself that kids were in school and I wasn't. In the days before seat belts Mom would make up the back, back seat of the station wagon as a bed so the "babies", Stacey, Shelley and Ann could sleep through the early morning drive. Those in the middle seat got to lean against the door with their pillow and sleep, but the poor person in the middle had to either sleep sitting up or ask to lean again the lucky person against the door.  But the best seat of all was between mom and dad in the front bench seat. I soon discovered that if I complained of getting car sick I got the front seat more often. I really truly got car sick but for some reason by brothers and sisters never believed me and to this day give me a hard time because I always got the front seat.

We also went to the beach every other year with Scott and Julie. We would rent a house on a California beach and spend a glorious week just being with cousins.  Our California cousins, Jan, Christie, Barbara, Susie and Carl and Joey, Valerie, Jared and David would sometimes  join us. It must have been quite an undertaking to plan meals and beds for all those kids but mom and Aunt Maxine never complained, or we were just clueless kids loving life.  In fact I  don't recall what we ate, just all of us kids eating outside on an old rickety picnic table.  I remember one beach house with just a cement side walk and 3 foot wall between us and the  ocean that had a converted garage behind it. The oldest kids got to sleep out there without parents. It was wonderful. We played cards, talked and hung out to our pre-adolescent  hearts content.

Chris, Brett, Annie, Shelley, Kent, Stacey, Scott, Christie and Roark.  I have no idea where Jayne, Julie and I were, but this is such a typical cousins moment.

My favorite beach picture. Me on the left and Jayne on the right. I think we were about 10 . I loved those swimsuits!

This next series of photograph tickles me.  We are in Uncle Bob and Aunt Maxine's above ground pool in their first home in Scottsdale.  I am actually not in the picture for some reason, but I could lie and say that I am Jayne.  I was probably sulking in a corner some,where I did that a lot in my growing up years. So sad.  From left to right,back row: Scott, Roark. Brett, Julie, Jayne. Front Row: Shelley, Suzanne, Stacey, Chris, and Annie

And the best picture of all is the picture of our family and Scott and Julie's family when we were teenagers in 1973. Look at those pants the boys are wearing. The short skirts. The side burns and hair. We were the 70s! Left to right, back row: Shelley, Ann, Suzanne, Kent (David); Front row: Scott, Jayne, Roark, Jeanne, Brett, Julie, Stacey, and Chris. 

I didn't feel a real need to go to my 40th high school reunion.I haven't stayed close to anyone. But this reunion was important. My cousins  were the people who mattered to me when I was growing up. Even though we only saw them once a year or we were always happy to see them. These memories are part of me, because there is something about family.